Adopted Child Returned To Sender

English woman Yvette Maguire (pictured) and her husband Mark endured years of infertility followed by a protracted adoption process to become parents.

But within two weeks of their adopted toddler, Ben, arriving in their home, they made the astonishing decision to return him to foster care. How could this happen?

Ben was anxious at leaving his siblings, also up for adotption, but settled in well to his new home. But within hours Yvette admits she was overcome with waves of anxiety about what she had done.

‘I was completely overwhelmed,’ she admitted to the Daily Mail. ‘On the outside I was doing all the right things – looking after him, playing with him, hugging him – but inside I felt only turmoil.

‘I have a very strong memory of looking at him in the first couple of days that he was with us, and thinking: “He didn’t come from me.” I felt no bond with him whatsoever.

‘I loved him in the abstract, but not inside. Clearly I hadn’t expected this to happen, or I wouldn’t have spent two years struggling to reach that point. But whenever I looked at him I was reminded only of my own failure to be a biological mother.

Psychologists diagnosed her with a form of PND (yes it can happen to adoptive parents) and recommended that Ben leave the family. He was soon sent into foster care.

Yvette said: ‘I know people will struggle to understand why I reacted so strongly to having Ben in the house, but I knew it wasn’t just a case of him settling in.

‘I knew that it just wouldn’t work out with him. I felt he deserved to be with someone who could truly love him, and that I couldn’t give him that.

She has since reconciled herself with remaining childless. And in a happy twist, Ben was adopted by his foster family and formed a close with their young daughter.

But still I can’t help wonder how all those psychological screenings required for adoptions couldn’t have picked this up. And why wasn’t Yvette given longer to bond with her new son? Even biological parents often struggle to form a bond for months after childbirth.

On the other hand perhaps it is better than Yvette dealt with the situation so quickly, allowing Ben for another chance at happiness. What do you think?

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