Are Dads Getting A Bum Rap?
Posted by Amber Robinson at 10:52 AM on November 26, 2008
Have you noticed that more and more men, especially dads, are depicted in the media complete idiots? You know, all the ads where Dad can’t think of what to cook so pulls something out of the freezer to fool his dear family, or balks at nappy changing.
Sacha Molitorisz, over at the pleasingly punctuated Who’s Your Daddy?, has had enough.
As I look around, however, I see more and more dads (and men generally) being depicted as bumbling and incompetent. If you believe these ads, billboards and music videos, a dad’s place is at the bottom of the domestic pecking order, in last place.
He spoke to a few experts to find out what is going on in popular culture when it comes to portraying men.
Dr Stephen Dann, a senior lecturer in marketing at ANU argues against sexist ads, including ads that depict men and dads as useless. As he says, such depictions often play into traditional stereotypes:
The “dumb daddies”, “useless men” and the resurgent “so simple, even a daddy can use it” approach remains a neat dual-edge role of degrading the worth of men, of male child-rearing, of stay at home fathers and single fathers and reaffirming that the “proper” role of women is in the career role of mothering men and children. Males get to be overgrown infants, women get to be a second mother to their husbands, and expected to care for “the men”. Or in other words, nothing really different from the housewife role-model in the next advert over.
And while only a misogynist would argue that men truly have it worse in society than women (who remain overwhelmingly the majority of victims in domestic violence cases), this constant putting down of men may be having a negative effect on the next generation.
An overseas reader commented on Molitorisz’s column with the following:
As one who has volunteered with “disadvantaged” boys for four years (in New York), one trend I have observed is that boys feel the treatment they receive in school and in society is that they are second class citizens when compared to the girls. They are punished for acts which girls are not punished for, they are treated as thugs, labelled as abusive and unable to learn, etc. I do think the popular culture portrayals of boys and men do inform and effect to some degree how these young men are treated by both teachers and administrators – who are primarily female – and their female peers.
Indeed, I have noticed than in browsing fertility forums and the like that many women would prefer to give birth to girls these days. Are boys getting a bad rap? How can we ensure that they don’t get left behind as society changes?
As a mother to a spirited little boy, I hope to equip him with the domestic skills necessary to function as an equal member of a household. It’s the least I can do.
The answer is simple, getting those who need to address their sexism, misandry, discrimination and gender biases is quite another. As a mother to a son, you are going to have to empower him to believe that he can be as good as or better than a girl, not just in the household, but at school and in work. Very similar to what you were taught. You are also going to have to put your gender aside, and empower him to speak out against misandry, and yes that means, in 2008, being critical of women’s sexist anti-male perspective sometimes.
So good that you recognized that men are tired of media, shows etc marketed at women being sexist, but now it requires action on your part!!!
Raul
More men die of suicide proportionally than women, men are the majority of the homeless, the wounded veteran population. Men are the minority in professional colleges throughout the Western world.
Men are the overwhelming majority in the dirty, dangerous occupations that society needs. Male deaths are also, unfortunately, the vast majority of occupational deaths in these professions.
Yes, men do have it worse than women. Wake up. We are sick and tired of the misandry in Australia.
Quote from article:
“{women} remain overwhelmingly the majority of victims in domestic violence cases”
In NSW Courts last year the ratio of female to male offenders convicted of domestic violence was 1.8 to 1. That means 18 men for every 10 women.
The trend is simple. The ratio 10 years ago was 30 men convicted for every 10 women and 30 years ago it was 85 to 15.
Female domestic violence has been increasing markedly for 30 years while male domestic violence is falling.
Why? Because of the very reasons mentioned in this article – woman are being encouraged to treat their husbands like children and that means belting them when they are bad. These are not minor assaults that land women in Court, these are attacks that cause actual harm.
“And while only a misogynist would argue that men truly have it worse in society than women (who remain overwhelmingly the majority of victims in domestic violence cases), this constant putting down of men may be having a negative effect on the next generation.”
What an appallingly sexist thing to say. Perhaps you could enlighten me how not enjoying the same basic civil rights as women, being minimized at every turn, and the rampant misandry you yourself felt compelled to write about all contribute to the “priveleged” position men are in?
I mean, since you’re so sure women have it worse than men, I’d love to see your enumeration of the issues facing both sexes, and why those facing women are “more serious”.
Of course intellectual honesty, epecially in a public forum such as this, has never been a strongpoint of the media, nor it’s employees.
Incidentally, men constitue roughly 38% of the victims of DV, as supported by over 270 studies across the globe. The actual number of men affected is likely vastly underreported – especially given the fact that male victims of DV have been trotted out on such shows as Oprah…and MADE FUN OF ON NATIONAL TV!
Yep, that’ll encourage men to “come forward” eh? Good thing we don’t encourage a “chilling effect” in the reporting of crime for women TOO, elsewise, we may not be able to lock up so many men, and eliminate women’s Prison.
Sheesh.