There is a reason I don’t like talking about my baby name shortlist. In fact there are several reasons. The first reason being, that I don’t really care what you think about my list. I don’t care that you went to school with a real bitch in Grade Five with that name. I don’t care that you think I shouldn’t use it because there was a character in an obscure movie with that name who rose out of drains and killed people. I don’t care that you think it’s too trendy, or too weird.
Here’s a thought: if I wanted your opinion, I’d ask!
So I pretty much never bring up the topic, unless a new name has sprung to mind and I am contemplating on whether to add it to The List. Then I might ask. This drives friends and family crazy. I know they mean well. But until people can keep their random and tenuous name prejudices out of the conversation, I’d rather just not go there, OK?
The List is an Excel spreadsheet that currently has 16 names on it. Not exactly a shortlist. But for some reason, I’m finding girl’s names infinitely harder to settle on than boys names. I’m pretty sure there are more of them, for starters. And so many of them are pretty and eminently suitable.
To even get to 16 names has been a long process. First, my husband and I went through a baby name book and came up with individual lists, which we then cross-referenced and combined, vetoing any that either of us really disliked. I am still unsure why he doesn’t like Violet and Audrey, but we run our marriage as a democracy, so all I can do is hmmph in protest.
Then I visited the fabulous Nymbler site to find more names based on our preferences. The site uses a list of your preferred names to generate more in that style. You can then build up a list of your favourites and email to your partner. Too easy!
Once we had a big list, it was time to start refining. This is when I sought the opinion of a few trusted friends on the names I wasn’t so sure about. I also checked out the NSW Births Deaths and Marriages website to see which 100 girls names were most popular last year. I don’t want a kre8ive name like Myk’nzie, but nor do I want my daughter to be one of five Emilys in her class.
The next step was saying all the names out loud combined with our chosen surname (my husband’s). Combinations which look find on paper can sound dreadful when spoken – the very lovely Amelia was discarded for this reason.
Which brings us to our present list of 16 names. I’ll try to refine these more over the coming weeks, but I’ve got a feeling my baby will be one of those poor sods who remain unnamed for the first few days of life. How does Baby X sound?
Quick pregnancy update: A midwife visit this week revealed that baby has indeed turned head down! She’s punching my guts out at the moment, as 31-33 weeks is often the peak of movement. All is looking well for a late August delivery.
While i agree democracy has merit – I am of the view that carrying the wiggly worm for nine months gives the mother naming rights!
My youngest child was Daniel for the first 2 weeks of his life…My eldest was David and I thought David and Daniel went well together….It took my hubby that long to tell me he didn’t like Daniel…and so Jeff he became….and I now have a son-in-law called Daniel!!!!!!
I envy you – you have a toddler, a big pregnant belly, a fulltime job and you can still be bothered to go through that fairly lengthy process to figure out the name – my partner named both of our kids – i didn’t care!
Oh, your friends and family will love any name you choose as I bet they love you.
The only person who has any rights in the baby naming process is the child. No one has the right to ruin their child’s life by giving it a name that will be ridiculed. Intelligent people follow a set of rules.
. No child specific names. The name must sound reasonable for a person of any age.
. Ensure initials aren’t either a pronounceable acronym, a well known company name or a disease (Seriously, I went to school with a Sarah Theresa Daniel). Search for them on-line.
. Abbreviable names give the child more options. i.e. Michael gives the choice of Mick and Mike aswell. There are many others.
. Avoid feminised masculine names. i.e. Paulina,Michaela, Georgina, Peta e.t.c.
. Don’t name them after someone for that reason alone.
. No Elvis, Elton, Cher, Oprah or other obvious celebrity names.
. The bible is not a baby naming book.
The most important thing is to show the child some respect. Daisy-Boo is not acceptable. If you decide to treat your child like it is a possession rather than a responsibility and call it U-nique or Fifi Trixabell or Heavenly Hirani Tiger-lilly or Apple don’t be surprised if they sue you for cruelty when they hit eighteen.