Mum Finds Few Books About Sex For Boys

One of the things that terrified me deeply when I found out my second child was a boy was The Teen Years. See, I have almost no familiarity with teenage boys and what experience I did have wasn’t good. I went to an all-girls high school, and while I have a brother I was away at college most of his teenage time.

The idea of dealing with hormones and lust and insecurities and whatever else boys go through, not to mention trying to teach him a few things about respecting girls and women and not being a jackass, makes my head ache now and he’s still a sweet little toddler.

Feminist blogger Rebekah Spicuglia experienced the same thing when her 11-year-old son announced to her over the phone (she’s a long-distance noncustodial mom) that he was going through puberty. After talking with his teachers to see what sort of sex ed he’d be getting at school (short answer: not much), she headed for the bookstore.

She found that there isn’t a lot for her son’s age group that’s positive about sex, and nothing that has a LGTBQ perspective. But she did find a few helpful books, like My Body, My Self for Boys” and “The Talk” (which I have heard recommended elsewhere) about talking about sex with your kids.

Thanks to feminism, there seems to be a lot out there about empowering girls to have some self-respect in sex and relationships. But there’s not a lot for boys about how to treat women with respect and kindness, and I certainly see a lot of parents kind of looking the other way when their boys make comments about fat chicks or sluts or whatever when they’d be furious over someone saying the same thing about their daughters. And the prevailing culture is not helping us at all.

What books or resources have helped you? How do you address the “don’t be a giant douchebag” issue with your sons?