They were a reality couple, they were supposed to last forever. What went wrong?

They actually lasted quite a while for a “Reality” couple, 7 years to be exact. It’s sad to see couples split up, but it always makes me wonder what were the reasons, I only want to know just because I’m nosy.

I just watched Goonies the other day and I always think of Corey Feldman as Mouth.

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Seriously? Too little too late.

I guess the two of them are talking through friends and have admitted things never admitted before.

“The truth is both Guy and Madonna are becoming more and more open in their admissions that in many ways they regret getting divorced. It’s one of those rare situations where couples start to get on better once their marriage is over. Both of them are brilliant with the kids and have fond memories of their family life together. It’s almost as though they have forgotten about all the rows they had as their marriage headed for the rocks.”

I think the friends that are relaying the info are playing a weird game of telephone and have distorted the stories.

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Brinkley filed for divorce from Cook last year after she found out that he cheated on her. But now they’re back in court in Long Island. Cook is claiming that Brinkley is sabotaging his relationship with their children.

“She is doing everything she can to ruin my relationship with my kids. I am trying to move on with my life and I wish she would do the same.” He made the claim Cook and son Jack couldn’t go on a recent school trip to Egypt because Brinkley wouldn’t hand over the passport in a timely manner.

But according to Brinkley’s people, “Peter Cook’s claim that Ms. Brinkley refused to turn over her son’s passport is without merit and totally disingenuous.” Word is that Brinkley was “a few hours late as her friend’s mum had just died and Cook refused to go pick up the passport from her home.”

What kind of resolution are they looking at? Cook’s lawyers would like Brinkley to be put in jail! Plus they want more child visitation privileges and also that Brinkley sign up for anger management classes. But Brinkley would like Cook to be put in the slammer.

Brinkley’s lawyer, who showed up for the hearing said, “We’re here because Peter Cook filed what we believe is a frivolous application to the court. What Christie Brinkley wants is what’s best for her children. She wants to get this resolved fairly and get it all behind her.”

Oh why can’t those crazy kids just get along?

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That’s the figure hopping around the net at the moment (I found it on SoSo Juicy, then our own Brett Singer wrote about it over at ParentDish), one apparently court-ordered, so I suppose we aren’t to blame Heche and her soon-to-be ex.

And although they’re eminently fun to mock, this parenting coordinator gig sound fascinating. So I had to find out just what they’re there to do…and it sounds rather…wait for it…reasonable.

A neutral third party, it’s the parenting coordinator’s job to act as a go-between during a divorce. Essentially, they mediate disputes as they relate to parenting the children. So if mum thinks taking the kid to the movie set instead of kindergarten is good (one of the claims about Heche), dad doesn’t have to throw a screaming fit and say “uh oh, no way, nanny, nanny boo boo.”

It’s easy to say parents should just get over themselves and get along—and for the sake of the kids, we’d all like to think they would. But when two people are divorcing because they disagree with each other so strongly they’re actually dissolving their marriage, that disagreement is bound to crop up on basic belief lines…including decisions regarding their kids. And it isn’t feasible to go running to a judge every five minutes to discuss whether Johnny really deserve an XBox when his grades suck or Susie should be allowed to have her ears pierced at five or nine.

So, all agreed, great idea.

But getting back to that $US375 an hour. Are they nuts? Throwing money at parenting problems won’t make them go away. Fortunately, that’s not typical. In Florida, for example, when parents opt for parenting coordination, it’s an $US80 fee per hour split between them. That’s a price I’d pay for my kid’s health and well-being. How ’bout you?

Image: MSNBC

Time to get out the violins…Mel Gibson, who left his wife Robyn of 20 plus years for 39-year-old Oksana Grigorieva – who is now pregnant with his baby – is having a hard time pleasing both women and, as a result, his nerves are frazzled.

Mel has been meeting with his ex-wife, to hash out divorce details, and his new flame and baby mama is not happy about it.

An insider said, “Mel is desperately trying to keep both Robyn and Oksana happy, and his nerves are shot.”

Robyn filed for divorce earlier this year and was not speaking to Mel at all, but things have changed, and the two are communicating once again.

Details after the jump

“Mel has been meeting secretly with Robyn at his Holy Family Chapel in Agoura Hills to work out their divorce – and try to get her blessing to marry Oksana.

“He knows that Robyn still has a lot of control over his assets and their children’s opinion of him, so he’s being very nice to her. They’re getting along better than they have in years.”

Oksana, who is due this spring with Mel’s eighth child, is unhappy that he and Robyn are speaking.

“When Oksana found out about Mel’s secret meetings with Robyn, she went berserk. The key problem is Oksana knows Mel will always have a place in his heart for Robyn, and she’s scared to death that Mel might reconsider their divorce.”

Of course they’ll always have a bond… they were married for 20+ years and have seven kids!

Oksana is afraid the two might reconcile, but sources say that won’t happen – because Robyn has found love again. Good on ‘er!!!

“At this point, Robyn just wants the divorce to be finalised so she can move on with her life. And she wants the Gibson kids to be happy with both their parents’ new relationships.”

Mel hopes to marry his new love, but Oksana has threatened to put a stop to the nuptials if he doesn’t stop catching up with Robyn.

The source added, “Oksana is threatening to postpone the nuptials if Mel doesn’t stop meeting with Robyn and including her in financial matters regarding the family and the church.

“Oksana hates that Robyn is still in control of Mel’s money. She told him that there will be NO wedding until Robyn is 100 percent out of Mel’s life.”

Which, let’s face it, may never happen. Robyn and Mel will always been connected and there will be times when they’ll be together for their kids, weddings, the births of their grandchildren and they still have a minor child living at home…

So what do you reckon? What should Mel do? What would keep both women in his life happy?  

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Swine Flu: Mexico’s Patient Zero Is Baby Girl
Mexico’s first known swine flu case was a six-month-old baby girl in a northern part of the country who had no known contact with pig farms, the head of a laboratory studying the virus has said. Telegraph

Clearance Rates Are Booming, Baby
After a substantial summer slump in the property markets of Melbourne and Sydney, national auction clearance rates are again on the upswing, driven by a flood of first-home buyers keen to enter the market. The Australian

Xenophon Hails Agreement Protecting Kids From Pokies
State and Federal Gambling ministers have agreed poker machines and gaming rooms should be kept out of sight from children. ABC News

Sydney Mum ‘Forced Into Birth In A Bedroom’
A mother has claimed she was forced to give birth on her bedroom floor after being turned away from a Sydney hospital because there were not enough beds. The Daily Telegraph

Queensland’s Child Protection System Fails As 79 Children Die
Queensland Government says 79 children known to child safety authorities have died over the past year – a rise of more than 50 per cent in four years. Courier Mail

Stay-at-home Sons Are ‘More Violent’ Than Those Who Live On Their Own, Scientists Claim
Young men still living with their parents are more violent than those who have left the family home, according to scientists. Telegraph

Not only is the sterotype of the unwed single mother on welfare untrue, but being in a sole parent family doesn’t necessarily lead to adverse outcomes for children.

Institute Director, Professor Alan Hayes, says that,

“Where child and parent health is good, where there’s enough income and stable housing, and where there’s an extended family or social network, the risk of poor outcomes is lessened.”

An article published in the Institute’s flagship journal Family Matters suggests that co-operation and support can lessen the impact of separation.

“Research suggests that two key things strengthen sole parent families: support from extended family and friends and a positive co-parenting arrangement,” said the article’s author Elly Robinson, the Manager of the Australian Family Relationships Clearinghouse.

In addition, far from resigning themselves to a life on welfare, evidence suggests that many women go on to make successful new families as well as establishing themselves in work.

Don’t you just love shooting down stereotypes? By 2026 Australia is forecast to have almost 1.2 million sole-parent households – an increase of 42 percent since 2001, so we better get used to it and ensure that single parents have the support they need, especially in this tough economic climate.

A new study has found what plenty of kids of bitter, bickering parents already knew: staying together for the kids doesn’t work.

Looking at teens from almost two thousands households and tracking them through to their early thirties, the study out of Cornell University in New York linked “exposure to parental conflict in adolescence . . . with poorer academic achievement, increased substance use and early family formation and dissolution, often in ways indistinguishable from living in a stepfather or single-mother family.”

Again, not totally surprised here. But it’s an important finding FOR parents who have long sought comfort as they navigate the difficult road of divorce. The dissolution of a relationship is almost never easy, and blame is quite often the name of the game. When kids are involved, the ante is upped as couples have to factor in more than just the two people in the marriage itself.

Studies have already found that divorce does not change the way a person parents. If you’re doing a good job before the split, there’s no reason to think you’ll fall down on the job after the decree becomes final.

Parents should also take a long, hard look at their kids pre-split. Poor behavior that parents have often associated with post-divorce stress has been found to be something parents were overlooking in the midst of their marital discord. It was already there. The good news? Researchers say it doesn’t actually get worse.

At the end of the day, I could never tell someone, “hey, yeah, get divorced.” That’s a very personal decision. But knowing you’re worrying about your kids in the process means you’re already far ahead of a lot of parents.

Image: OrlandoNest

In other words – twenty-five separate studies that said the quality of marriage drops significantly after “baby makes three,” were too vague. They lumped us all together.

The hooey? University of California at Berkeley researchers Philip and Carolyn Cowan, will soon make a presentation to the Council on Contemporary
Families asserting that never before did researchers account for the parents who had an accidental pregnancy or who had disagreed before conception about whether both spouses actually wanted children.

Think about it. If one parent wants kids and the other doesn’t, shouldn’t it stand to reason that the arrival of said kid is going to make one spouse unhappy? And one unhappy spouse generally makes for an unhappy marriage. Say the Cowans, “couples who planned or equally welcomed the conception were likely to maintain or even increase their marital satisfaction after the child was born.”

The problem with most studies are the broad, sweeping generalisations, and parenting studies are no different. A rock-solid marriage will likely struggle after the birth of a child – parents are sleepless, therefore parents are stressed. Throw in say a sick child or a job loss (we have a lot of those these days), and who knows what might happen. But is that the fault of having kids? No. It might be kid-related, but not the fault of the decision to procreate or adopt.

In my personal experience, I know parents who had the “oops pregnancy” and rushed to get married who have now found the marriage is on the rocks. I also know a couple who were divorced within two years of their son’s birth because they had an oops pregnancy during marriage – and he wasn’t crazy about it. But my colleagues here on the ‘derby say they know couples who were fine… until they had the second child. That’s when life went haywire and the divorce man cometh.

So what to do, what to do? In her New York Times op-ed on the subject, Stephanie Coontz refers to psychologist Joshua Coleman suggestion: the airline warning to put on your own oxygen mask before you place one on your child also holds true for marriage.

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Image: ThePetitionSite

Gossip Girl actress, Kelly Rutherford, and her husband and going their separate ways and it’s definitely not an amicable split. There has been a lot of back and forth between the two and the accusations are flying.

Daniel Giersch is mad because he feels his kids aren’t going to have a stable upbringing while their mum is in New York working on the set of Gossip Girl. He claims that she has a temper and that she threw her laptop at him and tried to hit him with her fist.

The court papers he filed go into more detail about his feelings on the situation: Often times the TV show calls pressuring [her] to leave the hotels, asking her where she is, telling her that she is late and asking her to get into the van [which takes her to the set immediately]. Usually [her] stress causes Hermes to start crying which then causes [her] to be frustrated toward him. I do not believe this is a healthy lifestyle for him.”

“(Rutherford) has insisted to sign a new ongoing contract for her television show when, in fact, it would be in our children’s best interest if they are able to grow and thrive in a stable home in Los Angeles, rather than a hotel in New York with their mother absent.”

That’s his side of the story. She on the other hand is claiming that she fears for her sons safety.

She filed emergency papers barring Daniel from leaving the country with her son Hermes. She fears he will leave the country and won’t know where they are nor will she be able to find them.

She also told of his admission that there is an investigation in Germany, his home, that could end in an arrest for him.

In reading the court papers and the statements, I’m almost inclined to believe him more than her, even with the case pending in Germany. It might be because it sounds like she just wants to win and he actually wants to take care of the kids.

What do you think?

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